How
the Gun Lobby Works
I'm going to say this just as nicely as I can...
If you own a gun and you're not using it to regularly put food
on your family's table then I hope that you get shot.
Soon.
And I
hope it's in a place that really hurts, like the heart of someone
you love.
And I hope that person doesn't die immediately. I hope
they linger for a while so they can look up at you with pleading,
questioning eyes, wordlessly
blaming
you
and
your Smith & Wesson Penis Enhancer for having failed them.
I
want you to lay awake at night for years to come wondering how
you ever thought owning a gun could afford any type of protection
from someone else with a gun.
I'll say this again:
(1) You cannot protect yourself from a gun with a gun.
(2) You cannot outrun a bullet.
(3) The bad guys always shoot first.
-----------
IRS: "Hello. Internal Revenue Service."
Me: "Hi, there! Do you guys accept thoughts and prayers
instead of money?"
IRS: "No. Thoughts and prayers aren't worth anything."
Me: "Okay. Just checking."
--------
The Right knows that "thoughts and prayers" is
understood by the general populace to mean "We really don't
care about proles and we know they'll just forget about this
massacre in eleven days. Works every time."
And
yet they keep on using the phrase.
They're laughing at us.
They're laughing at our dead kids.
---------
The Second Amendment specifically cites "A well regulated
militia" but it's flat out ignored?
Why?
Suppose instead it read "A parade of clowns, being necessary
to the security of a free State" or "Three
wise men bearing gifts" or "A gaggle of orthodontists
wearing chipmunk suits". Would we ignore something that
obvious, too?
In at
least one of those cases it would seem to me that chipmunk regalia
would be the minimum requirement to own a gun, as would being
part of a well-regulated GODDAMN militia.
----------
I have a new name for anyone who still supports the Giant Fat
Bald Mango-Baby in the White House:
MAGA-fukkahs.
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Today's cartoon originally appeared 9-14-16.
Have a great weekend, everyone.
=Lefty=
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